The Road to Hell...

... is paved with good intentions.


As my summer vacation officially started this morning, here are all of the things I am going to do this summer:

• My laundry. ALL of it. Even the pile that got thrown in the back hall because we were having company and I didn't have time to fold it and now it's been out there for a month and I should donate all of that stuff to Goodwill since we haven't missed it anyway. (Holy run-on sentence, Batman! See what my laundry does to me?)
• Organize the playroom. The one you can't walk into without actually having a climbing license to get over the piles of stuff.
• Have a yard sale (or four) to purge some stuff.
• Not end up on Hoarders. See above.
• Exercise every day. Don't laugh.
• Get my nails done. Because I have had not one, but two gift certificates in my purse for over a year.
• Get my hair cut. See above.
• Do something fun with the kids every day. This is probably the only bullet on this list that will actually happen. But, I suppose that is the way it should be. Kids should trump laundry and cleaning, right?

So, bring on my two months off! (And let's hope September doesn't find me buried under laundry and toys with long hair, gross nails, & a giant ass.)

Cue Alice Cooper...

If you enjoy the blog, why not become a follower? I'm the one who's OUT FOR SUMMER! You can also stalk find me on Facebook and Twitter. Like the page and follow me!

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Tuesday's Tip (#2)

Here's a tip for you:

Bathing suit bottoms make excellent underwear substitutes.

I've lamented about my laundry issues and lack of socks on numerous occasions. I just can't keep up with the laundry for 7 people. Many a night, you will find me running around like a mad woman making sure everyone has what they need for the next day - school uniforms, socks, underwear, etc. Unfortunately, I sometimes spend so much time worrying about everyone else, that I forget to take care of myself. One morning, as I was getting ready for work, I realized that I didn't have any clean underwear. Not even the ugly granny panties that are still in the back of the drawer from some pregnancy or another. Not only that, but I was wearing a skirt to work. So there I stood, in front of my bare drawer, and realized that I had two choices: go commando under a skirt (can anyone say Britney?) or wear the black bathing suit bottoms from my tankini. There really was only one option. In all actuality, they were quite comfortable. 

So there you have it. When laundry quandaries abound, throw on a bathing suit and get on with your day.

Have a tip to share? Or maybe a shameful confession about going commando? Feel free to leave a comment below...

... & be sure to check back every Tuesday for a new tip!

It's Raining Something (& It's Not Men)

I've posted before about the fact that my kids are weird. That's really nothing new. They often invent crazy games to play when I'm ignoring them busy that I usually only hear in the background. It's one of the perks of having so many children so close in age. It's like Lord of the Flies a cute little preschool.


Anyway, today was one of their inventive days. PJ and Patrick were playing a video game in the living room, so I went to my bedroom to read. Unfortunately, I found Lucy and Sophie in there with Sean and Charlotte laughing hysterically at the "baby channel". (This is some horrible channel on DirectTV that is like watching a Baby Einstein movie 24/7.) The big kids think it's hysterical to watch and the little ones actually like it. Needless to say, I wasn't going to be able to read in my own room. So, I climbed into Sean's bottom bunk to read in peace.


I know. I read that last sentence, too. I should know better than to think I'm going to get a moment's peace in this loony bin. As I was quietly laying on the bottom bunk, I saw Lucy tiptoe past me and climb up the ladder. Sophie followed softly behind with an armload of dirty laundry. At this point, it was still quiet, so I just shrugged them off. I could hear them giggling above me, but I learned from my dad at a young age how to become so engrossed in a book that you legitimately cannot hear what's going on around you. It's a blessing and a curse. All I eventually heard was, "Quick, quick, let's get down and then press the button!" This was followed my mad scrambling down the bunk bed ladder.


And that's when it began to rain dirty laundry.


Based on the laughter, there is nothing - I mean nothing - funnier than dirty laundry rain. Lucy and Sophie had been fastidiously laying articles of clothes over each fan blade from the top bunk of the bed. They'd lay a bathrobe over a fan blade and then push it around and lay some underwear over the next one. After the fan was covered, they raced down the ladder to turn the fan on and dance under the flying clothes. This is what passes for entertainment when they're left to their own devices. 

Watching them laugh hysterically while scooping up dirty laundry for another round really was quite funny. If only there were some way to make this game work in my favor. Some kind of new-fangled laundry sorting game? I'll have to spend some time working on that idea. In the mean time, I'm just going to brace myself for the next storm.

If you enjoy the blog, why not become a follower? I'm the one standing under the dirty laundry rainstorm. You can also stalk find me on Facebook and Twitter. Like the page and follow me!

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And don't forget to visit my Zazzle store. You know you want some!

Christmas Socks

Let's talk about my socks. Halloween is a few days away. Some people like to wear cute little novelty socks. I happen to have novelty socks on today. But not Halloween socks. Christmas socks. Sadly, they're a step up from what I normally wear... no socks.


I hate to do the whole "woe is mom" thing, but I often come last in my house. Some days, it's all I can do to get everyone else in the house into clean socks and underwear. I've been known to wake with a start at two in the morning with the heart-stopping realization that one of the kids has no clean uniform shirts. So, I run to the washer and sleepily start a load of whites that I will then dry sometime before the crack of dawn. 


Then, after the chaos that is my morning routine, I prepare to get myself ready (last). I open my top drawer and find the pile of mismatched socks from everyone in the family. I have no matching socks. Unless you count these nice, black knee-socks with little, red Santas on them. In my defense, they do match what I'm wearing today. As long as no one gets too close, I should be able to hide the fact that I am wearing Christmas socks 5 days before Halloween.


My question is this: Where did I go wrong? I am not the most organized person. Who decided to coronate me the Queen of Laundry? Somewhere in our marriage, my husband and I adopted these very Cleaver-like roles. He does the "man's work" - take out the trash, mow the lawn, change the light bulbs, remove the spiders. I do the "lady's work" - cook the meals, bathe the children (on a good day), clean the house (ha!), do the laundry (ha! ha!). Clearly, the laundry situation is out of my control. The dirty pile just keeps growing no matter how many loads I do. The clean pile is still waiting to be folded and put away. And I have no socks. 


I'm thinking there must be some way I can make this a family affair. My oldest is almost 8. Can I teach him to fold? Or maybe someone has developed some sort of "laundry app" for the iPad. That will get my husband interested for sure.


Regardless, here I sit in my ill-timed Christmas socks. Meh... maybe I'll just pretend I'm early for something for once. That would be the day!




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